Jeannie Norris - Methodist Home for Children

Myles & Mia

Marc Ridel Creative

MYLES, AGE 8
MIA, AGE 6

A few years ago, they might have laughed at the idea. They definitely would have called it crazy.

But Tabitha and David couldn’t see then what they see now: How their hearts and home would stretch to make room for five children under the age of 9.

Tabitha and David adopted their first two children in September – a brother-sister pair, 8-year-old Myles and 6-year-old Mia. And when September rolls around again, they expect to have adopted another sibling group – by then ages 6, 5, and 4.

Let that sink in.

In the span of one year, this couple is adopting five children, ages 8, 6, 6, 5, and 4. That’s a 3rd grader, two 1st graders, a kindergartener, and a preschooler. In eight years, four of them will be in middle school at the same time, with one ahead in high school.

Myles and Mia came to this Franklin County foster home in May 2016 after their mother left them with friends and never came back. Social services tried twice to place them with relatives, first in Wilmington and then in Georgia, but neither option worked out. By the time it became clear Myles and Mia had no other family to help, Tabitha and David were parenting a second group of siblings already on track for adoption.

So the decision was made, no discussion needed. Tabitha and David would adopt all five of their foster children – Myles and Mia, plus three others we’ll introduce in the fall

Halie, Ryan, & Madison

Lorreen and Dan and their two sons were relocating to North Carolina. They were house hunting and, like all homebuyers, had a checklist of features. The house had to accommodate their mobility – both sons have spina bifida and wheelchairs are their primary mode of transportation. And it had to be big. They were a family of four, but Lorreen and Dan had decided to become foster parents.

When they found a house they liked, they prayed together and looking up, they both just knew. Dan spoke first. “We’re going to live here. And we’re going to get three kids.” Lorreen responded, “Two girls and a boy.” And so their story begins.

HALIE, AGE 15
RYAN, AGE 12
MADISON, AGE 11

The kids are arm wrestling in the front room. When Halie is pinned, she calls out “Whoopsie-daisy!” and her laughter fills the air. Anyone who has known her longer than a year knows this is nothing short of a miracle.

Lorreen and Dan met Halie two years ago when she came to their home for a one-week respite visit. They knew she had hemiparesis, or left-side weakness, a result of a congenital brain disorder and they knew this limited her ability to communicate. But they didn’t know how much pain she had.

She was terrified of Dan, all men really, because of abuse she suffered while living with her biological mother. She couldn’t regulate her emotions or make attachments. She felt loss and confusion at being separated from her home, her mother, her aunt, and two siblings. And because she could communicate none of this, she raged.

It would be great to say that Lorreen and Dan loved her through it, but that doesn’t tell the full story. They loved her, yes, but they also gave her a safe home, medical interventions, consistency, and stability. She improved, then thrived. And it was at that point Lorreen and Dan learned Halie had a brother and sister, each living in a different foster home.

“When I heard this,” Dan says, “I just looked at Lorreen and said, ‘We can’t let these kids separate.’ ” Soon they were visiting one weekend a month; then two. They would play together before returning to their foster homes. Over time, the siblings became comfortable together and with Lorreen and Dan and their two sons. And then the phone rang.

“Methodist Home for Children called and asked if we would be a family to all three,” Dan says. “And I replied, ‘Abso-fricking-lutely.’ ”

Last December, the teens were adopted in a ceremony uniquely styled for this family. Halie brought her baby doll, who was also officially adopted – and they unapologetically laughed and cheered. They had come a long way and were joyously committing to a lifetime of family.

Summer

Summertime. It’s that magical time of year when the pressure is off, and a kid can be a kid.

It’s a chance to relax, explore, learn – and create happy memories that last.

But what if your summer is a stretch of empty days, confined indoors?

Children come to us having never experienced the joy of a summer adventure. They’ve never been on a trip. They’re never been to camp. They have not seen the ocean, much less learned to sail. They’re never ridden a horse or learned to fish.

Together, we can give these children a summer to remember. How would you like to help?

SUMMER COOL-OFF ice cream party or boat ride at the lake $50
SUMMER STAPLES swim lessons, art lessons, or day camp $100
SUMMER DASH church camp, sports camp, or DC day trip $250
SUMMER GETAWAY baseball game & pizza night for a group home $500
SUMMER TRADITION one week at sleep-away camp $1,000

Que and Isaiah

This is how it looks to adopt: This is adoption day for Que, 6, and Isaiah, 5, who lived more than 4 ½ years in foster care with Gary and Kathy. Please share your words of encouragement and congratulations in the reply field below – the family will enjoy.

You may never have been to an actual adoption ceremony so here’s a tip: If you ever attend one … bring tissue.

Last month, when Kathy and Gary officially adopted their two boys, EVERYONE was so happy, they cried. The mom, the dad, all of the extended family members present, the entire MHC team, the social worker, the attorney, and yes, even the presiding clerk. It was just that kind of morning. We believe that every child deserves a chance – and happily, joyfully, with tears in our eyes, we celebrate with this new family.

Foster Parenting

Some foster parents want to adopt; others just want to help children transition into permanent homes with birth family or adoptive parents. Either way, you don’t have to be wealthy or married to be a foster parent. You don’t have to own your home.

What it takes

Our most successful parents have experience with children and a heart for helping people with mental health issues. Since foster children have been removed from their parents or primary caretakers, they often have special needs. Most are age 5 or older and arrive with emotional and behavioral challenges because of abuse, neglect, or abandonment.

We need foster parents who are willing to learn about grief and loss, show compassion, introduce structure, and support the child as part of a team, which may include doctors, therapists, schools, family members, social services, and mental health agencies.

Our foster parents get 60 hours of training as they prepare to become licensed and 10 hours annually on topics such as behavior management and trauma.

Independent Services

Even if you plan to foster or adopt through another agency or social services, our staff can help you through the process with MAPP training or home studies. Contact us at [email protected].

Want to know more?

We offer foster parents 24 / 7 support and competitive compensation. We do not discriminate on the basis of age, race, gender, marital status, or employment status.

Talk to us:

What Matters Most

They roll in to give what matters most When you’re away from home – and you can’t go home – a team of mother figures shows up at the door to give you some love. And you realize then, no matter what mistakes you made, someone is out there rooting for you.

Meet the Swansboro United Methodist Women.

From 45 minutes south, they drive caravan-style up Highway 17 to deliver comfort and encouragement to the boys at our Craven transitional living home: prize bags for field day, gift cards for Christmas, holiday comfort food, birthday cards, valentines, Easter lunch, pizza, wooly hats, homemade cookies.

And they want you to know something: They receive as much as they give.

“It’s not a matter of just giving,” says Marilyn Boyce. “Because when people give, it puts them in a superior position and, while we’re older than these children, this is a matter of
reciprocation. They give to us in ways they probably don’t really know.”

A couple of years ago, the Craven boys painted a serving platter with hearts and confetti colors; they glazed and fired it, and they gave it to the Swansboro women. That platter comes out at every single circle meeting – second Wednesday of the month – as a reminder of their friendship.

“We see so much hope in them,” says Gay Licko. “We get to share a little in the plans for their future. We are allowed to be part of it, and we feel welcomed.”

Isaiah

Two years ago, Mandy and Doug announced to friends that they were going to be foster parents. Their license had been approved, and they wondered what “mystery kids,” as their daughter, Darian, called them, would come.

Would they get a boy or a girl? Maybe a toddler, maybe a middle-schooler? Would it be one child or a sibling group? Tomorrow or months away?

It was exciting to think about, but bittersweet too. Before cancer took 5-year-old Denny, their son and brother, a liver transplant from another child had extended his life. They knew, as they poured their hopes and prayers into saving Denny, that someone else was grieving the unthinkable. Their own loss would come two years later.

Now they were preparing their hearts to love – and possibly lose – a child carrying his or her own grief, and they wondered what it would be. Loss of parents, home, siblings, school? What else?

Their mystery kid, it turns out, is named Isaiah.

Born into foster care, Isaiah was living in his third home, heading to his fourth, on that November day when Mandy and Doug announced their plans to foster. They would become his fifth and final home – a permanent family for a boy who loves soccer, running fast, holiday decorating, raking leaves, and visiting the beach. Isaiah’s adoption was completed in May.

Jumping Back In

Alexis, age 6; Jamie, age 5

They had done this. Kevin and Susan had raised three children into their teens already, so a couple of toddlers couldn’t do anything to surprise them. Right?

On his first day alone with Alexis and Jamie, Kevin turned his back for just a moment while the kids were in the kitchen. When he looked again, he saw the 2- and 3-year-olds “showering” in the water dispenser on the refrigerator.

The last time Kevin had parented preschoolers, his refrigerator didn’t even have a water dispenser. Now he and Susan were discovering all that had changed since their own teenagers were young – and suddenly remembering how relentless young children can be.

“They were everywhere,” Susan says.

Susan and Kevin were new to foster care then, but they were ready to jump back into the preschool hustle of car seats, diapers, and potty-training. They knew the first days with Alexis and Jamie would be chaotic. They were prepared for the demands of parenting neglected children who’d lost everything. Alexis missed her birth mother, and both struggled to sleep.

Today Alexis and Jamie are bright, happy kids – still everywhere, eager to try new things. They were adopted this summer and live every day secure in the love of their parents, Susan and Kevin, and their siblings Jacob, Emily, and Sam.

Christmas Joy

When a 7 year old child says, “Mom, I want to spread joy at Christmas” … when churches, families, Army Reservists, hoteliers, restaurants, schools, foundations, fitness clubs, hospitals, car dealerships, house cleaning services, radio stations, book stores, and friends on Facebook ALL join together to make sure our children and families have joy at Christmas, we are thankful. Your giving brings more joy than you can imagine.

10 reasons to foster

CLICK HERE to watch Kevin and Susan read their list … with a little help from Jamie and Alexis

#10 Love is not a finite resource. We all have plenty to go around.

#9 A preschooler rolling her eyes at a teenager is both hilarious and character-building!

#8 The network of foster families in Pitt County and Eastern North Carolina is wonderful – they have challenged us to be better people.

#7 Some things are easier the 4^th and 5^th time around (and some things are not)

#6 You get a front-seat view into the lives of social workers, foster care workers, guardians ad litem, lawyers, and judges who work tirelessly for the safety and security of all children. It is hard to imagine more selfless, challenging, yet rewarding jobs.

#5 Littles make Christmas really fun!

#4 You’ll become more grateful.

#3 Preschoolers are excellent birth control (especially for teens).

#2 The blessings you receive will far exceed the effort you give.

#1 Sleep is overrated.

Author: Jeannie Norris